"just relax, let us carry you through."
A bright light blinded me as many hands lifted me onto an operating table. I felt warmth; I felt the touch of nylon gloves and hospital gowns. Each limb nestled into blankets.
I was about to have my appendix removed, a procedure known as a laparoscopic appendectomy. The Surgical team asked me if I was afraid.
I replied, "I feel safe. There is no place I'd rather be right now. You are all professionals. You do this every day. I trust you" there was a pause in the room, an exchange of glances.
I felt that perhaps nobody had ever said those words to them. I could feel a calm awareness grow in them.
"we're going to take care of you," one of them said as I drifted off into twilight sleep. I heard some discussion about my chest hair before I lost consciousness. I'd like to think I giggled a little before I was gone. They had to shave a swath through the jungle on my torso to make their incisions.
I had a rather positive hospital stay. It was a turning point in my life, my first actual confrontation with the wisdom of death, and even a transcendent experience. But that is a story for another time. Today I wish to talk about medicine.
The western world of medicine is masterful in repairing the damaged body. However, I feel it has neglected the mind and the soul dismissing them as unnecessary to healing.
We have made such astounding progress in understanding the physical body that many conditions that were once fatal are now routine. Yet all our power is held back by lack of access and, worse, lack of empathy.
I don't think doctors are bad people. Merely they are groomed to be as logical as possible. Memorizing textbooks and diagrams. They have to stop seeing patients as people and more like puzzles to be solved. They have to close themselves off emotionally as we don't prepare them to deal with people's emotions. They've been set up to fail people in profound ways at times, despite all the good they do.
I see our over-reliance on medication, our beurocratic mess of an insurance system, and the often harrowing experiences of patients as byproducts of the same issue.
Places of healing and medicine itself have been infiltrated by greed.
Health should not be for profit. Ever. We should compensate doctors and staff, and research is risky and expensive, But we should not be trying to extract profit from these systems. It is one realm where I don't feel the marketplace or capitalism will ever align with our needs as living, breathing people.
I say all of this because I don't know a doctor that isn't frustrated with the way things are today. Private conversations with practicing or retired medical personnel are painted with stories of regret and injustices. So much stands between them and their desire to help people.
It can feel hopeless at times.
I see an integration of spiritual healing practices into our current medicine structures as a solution. A toolset that gives Doctors the ability to connect with patients gracefully is deeply needed. We have excelled at repairing the physical body. Yet we hide from what I see as a potent truth.
We draw closer to the age where emotional experiences and the life inside our minds will be more visible to others. Consequently, this will highlight the connection between states of mind and health outcomes.
Those who are willing must bridge the gap must endeavor to bring light to these spaces. There are whole dimensions of medicine cast into shadow in our time. We know intuitively that how we feel emotionally matters deeply.
A patient surrounded by hope and positivity heals much faster than one neglected or treated callously. Stranger still, from thousands of drug trials, we know that placebo can "trick" people into recovery. We have to rule it out in all our tests, lest we lose a drug that doesn't actually work into the world. How could a person affect their health by merely believing they got a new miracle drug? When all they received was a sugar pill?
If we do not honestly explore these ideas, the power of the mind and the power of emotional states. We doom people to suffer needlessly.
I imagine hospitals becoming softer places, full of organic shapes, plant life, and outdoor spaces. I also sense that baths of flowing water and vibrations will become standard parts of treatment, particularly during births. Doctors will work alongside therapists, spiritual healers, and various other guides to ensure that people get fully integrated care.
A renewed sense of public health is a duty of the common collective. We have to reclaim healing as partly intuitive. We cannot reduce the body ot its material parts, and we cannot seek material solutions to immaterial problems.
Many in spiritual circles have a deep suspicion and mistrust of Western medicine. While certainly justified, it is ultimately damaging to culture because it removes the most awakened, conscious, loving people from the most needed spaces. The reformation of both communities, built on trust and new technologies, is vital to a better world.
I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere besides a hospital the day my appendix ruptured. Yet I witness the failings of these institutions too.
I don't have the answers to the enormous problems between us and a better system. Yet, I feel compelled to offer an idea of where we may go.
I see medicine transforming into an immersive experience guided by community and trust. Stripped of its authoritative and economic underpinnings. Something we see as a holistic part of life.
I don't know what it will look like exactly. Yet, I know what it will feel like. During my hospital stay, I was under constant monitoring due to the severity of my situation. My appendix was nearly four times its usual size, and they were afraid it might rupture at any moment.
I was wheeled to a quiet corner of the ICU and attended to by two nurses, on rotation every 30 minutes. I have never felt safer or more cared for. They were two of the kindest woman I have ever met. The hospital was unusually slow, and consequently, several other staff members with nothing better to do came by to check on me too.
I made many friends in my short stay.
Moving through the healing trauma should feel no different than being surrounded by a caring community. Dare I say one should feel loved in those moments. We must do away with the cold, calculating mind and find a connection through the heart.
I feel we all yearn for that chance. To heal someone. To save. If we can tap into that desire earnestly once more. There is no wound too grave for us to mend. It's why so many people passionately dive into the melee of modern health, attempting alternative practices for people when the western model fails them.
We're not looking to scam one another usually. We earnestly desire to see the people we care about to be healthy and well. We have an ever more profound desire to see all people thrive. Nothing cheers people up more than solving someone else's problem. It is where our intensity emerges online, especially in the post-covid world we live in. Health and wellness are deeply important to us.
But one cannot wade into the waters of medicine and discard the textbooks and hard-earned knowledge of western medicine. Those in alternative medical communities rarely wish to discuss the times they failed to help. There is a downside to less regulation and licensing. Many suffer needlessly by rejecting western medicine and seeking some oil or exotic therapy. Even the well-meaning can cause great harm.
There is room both inside western medicine and alternative medicine for accountability and transparency. Minds need to open to new possibilities in both communities.
There is some mutual ground and bridge between the world we have built and the world we all know is possible. What is alive in me is that we must find ways to integrate all of the great healing traditions together into something entirely new.